Dek Ai's Aqiqah

last night we did aqiqah for Dek Ai'

from this web I excerpted the definition of aqiqah
Aqiqah literally means cut and it is often used for the hair of a new born baby that is cut or shaved.
Aqiqah is defined as the animal that is slaughtered on the occasion when the hair of a new born is shaved.
The animal is called aqiqah and it is also encouraged for the animal to be called nasikah or zhabihah.
The time to perform aqiqah begins with the birth of the baby. It continues until the baby reaches the age of puberty or independence. Once the person is independent, the responsibility of performing aqiqah rest on his ownself and he can perform it for his ownself if this act has not been done previously. The best time to perform aqiqah is on the seventh day after the birth of the baby. This was reported in Abu Daud where the Prophet ( Peace be upon him ) said : " A young boy is cleansed with his aqiqah. An animal is slaughtered for him on the seventh day, his name is given and his head shaved."


we invited neighbors and friends. and alhamdulillah the ceremony went well.
hope Ai' will grow healthy, and be a shalih boy. amin


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the inconvenience.

aku suka kalau teman anak-anakku datang ke rumah. main seharian. apalagi menginap. mereka juga sepertinya senang. mereka tahu aku galak, tapi sebenernya baik hati (uhuk!)
I like it when my children's friend come to my house. all day long. or stay over. I think they are happy too. they now I'm a screamer but very kind *uhuk*.

jika mereka masih berada di rumahku saat tiba waktu makan, aku akan menyuruh mereka makan. jika Ibu mereka tidak mengijinkan untuk makan 'di rumah orang', maka mereka akan aku suruh pulang untuk makan di rumah. aku menghormati kebijakan ibunya, apa pun alasannya. meskipun aku sendiri sama sekali tidak keberatan mereka makan di rumahku, seperti aku tidak keberatan jika sekali waktu anakku main ke rumah temannya dan ditawari makan di sana.
when it is meal time and they are still at my house, I will ask them to have meal together with my children. if their parents don't allow that, then I'll ask them to go home and have meal at home. I respect their parents policy, for whatever the reason be. although I don't mind at all letting them have meal at my house, as I don't mind if some times my children go to their friends house and asked to have meal there.

beberapa hari di awal liburan ini, teman-teman Ibit dan Ar Ir berkumpul di rumah. ramai banget kadang aku sampai kasihan Ai' yang sering kaget karena jeritan teriakan. untunglah dengan memberi sedikit pengertian mereka bisa lebih menahan diri untuk tidak terlalu bervolume tinggi jika sedang dekat tempat Ai' tidur.
these early days of holidays, Ar Ir and Ibit's friend came by. so noisy but fun. the noise some times bothered my baby but thank God it was easy to make them understand and not to scream near where the baby sleeps.

kemarin, ketika tiba jam makan, Ibu dari salah satu teman Ibit menelpon, meminta putrinya untuk pulang makan. si anak minta ijin untuk tetap tinggal dan makan di rumahku, tapi ibunya tidak mengijinkan. akhirnya dia membereskan mainan yang baru saja dia pakai (ini peraturan kalau main di rumahku - beresin dulu baru pulang :D) dan bersiap pulang. kebetulan saat itu, ada tukang dawet lewat dan anak-anak mau. selesai beberes mereka minum dawet dulu.
yesterday, at lunch time, one of the children's mother called, asked for her daughter and son to go home and have lunch at home. the daughter asked if she were allowed to stay and have lunch with Ibit but the answer was no. so she tided up the toys and got ready to go home. by the time a dawet seller was passing by and I treated the children. so after finished tidying up the toys the enjoy the drink.

saat itu lah si ibu yang tadi menelpon datang menjemput. dia minta maaf karena anaknya 'merepotkan'. aku tertawa saja, karena sama sekali tidak merasa direpotkan. mereka semua gampang diatur dan menyenangkan. dia juga menyatakan keheranannya, kenapa dua anaknya betah banget kalau main di rumah Ibit.
that time, the mother who just called came to pick up her kids. she apologized for her kids have given me some inconvenience. I just smiled and said it was no inconvenience at all. they were all have been so nice. she also tell me, she wondered why her children like to stay ang play in Ibit's house.

aku sempat mendengar si ibu menanyai teman Ibit itu, "kamu barusan makan apa?"
"ngga makan apa-apa"
"jangan bohong, Ibu cium bau makanan di mulutmu"
akhirnya anak itu mengaku.
I caught a conversation between that mother and child when theyleft
"what did you eat?"
"nothing"
"don't lie, I can smell something"
and the child confess.

sungguh, aku tidak mengerti kenapa ada orang yang melarang anaknya makan di rumah orang, sampai segitunya. aku takut apa-apa yang aku hidangkan dianggap tidak layak makan buat anak-anak mereka...
really, I don't get it, why some people prohibit their kids eating something from others. I mean, they know me, and I am not a bad guy. I'm afraid they think I give the children food that are not foodgrade.

***
hari ini rumah tidak seramai kemarin. dua kakak beradik yang dijemput ibunya kemarin itu, tidak datang lagi. seorang teman Ibit yang lain, yang biasa nyamperi mereka sambil perjalanan menuju ke rumahku mengatakan, bahwa mereka berdua tidak diperbolehkan oleh ibunya untuk main ke rumah Ibit.
today this house is not as noisy as yesterday. those two kids picked up by their mother don't come. a friend has came by on her way here, she said they both are not allowed to go to Ibit's house anymore.

sedih ngga sih. apa aku sudah melakukan sebuah kesalahan? aku harus bagaimana?
isn't this so sad? did I do some thing wrong? what should I do?

the brothers

Ar Ir were just woke up from their afternoon nap and walked into my room. baby Ai' was just finished taking bath.
Ar Ir baru bangun tidur siang dan masuk ke kamarku. Ai' baru saja selesai mandi



what do you think those big brothers were thinking?
apa ya, yang sedang dipikirkan kakak-kakak itu?

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the hero...

pahlawan...

...lies in everybody. the brave hearts are those who conquer the fears.
...ada dalam diri setiap orang. pemberani adalah mereka yang mengalahkan ketakutan.

Dan's (one) big fear was height. he has a phobia. but slowly he can get along with height. standing on the third step of a ladder used to make him trembling and sweat, but now he can climb to the rooftop.
salah satu ketakutan Dan yang besar adalah ketinggian. dia punya phobia. tapi perlahan dia bisa akrab dengan ketinggian. dulu, berdiri di anak tangga ketiga bisa bikin gemetar dan berkeringat. sekarang dia bisa naik ke atap.

his other fear was blood -- and things related to it. he once almost got fainted when his big toe was stubbed and bleeding. he almost got fainted when he accompanied Ar picking his baby tooth and needed an injection on his gum. thing like that.
salah satu ketakutannya yang lain adalah darah -- dan hal-hal yang berkaitan dengan itu. pernah dia hampir pingsan karena jempol kakinya kesandung dan berdarah. hampir pingsan ketika menemani Ar harus disuntik gusinya waktu cabut gigi. hal-hal semacam itu lah.

through my first and second time delivering my children, Dan wasn't there beside me to accompany me. I understood very well his fear. if he got fainted while I was struggling, it would be an inconvenience. so I let him waited outside, just as long as he was there.
waktu melahirkan anak pertama dan kedua, Dan tidak menunggui aku. aku mengerti sekali ketakutannya. kalau dia pingsan saat aku sedang berjuang, alangkah repotnya. jadi aku biarkan dia menunggu di luar ruangan.

on our last visit to the doctor before the baby birth

but on my third, I asked him to accompany me, inside the room, beside me. I said, "I'm feeling too old to have a baby. I am not that young and strong. I am so nervous. I need you to strengthen me". I meant it.
tapi di kehamilan ketiga, aku minta dia untuk menemani aku di dalam ruangan, di sampingku. kataku, "aku merasa sudah tua untuk punya bayi. aku ngga muda dan kuat lagi. aku gugup banget. aku butuh kamu temani". aku sungguh-sungguh.

it was a blessing that he agreed. Dan sat there beside my bed during my labor. and witnessed the second Dek Ai' breathed and cried for the first time. and not got fainted.
sungguh sebuah anugrah dia mau. Dan duduk di sebelah tempat tidurku selama proses persalinan. menyaksikan detik Dek Ai' bernafas dan menangis untuk pertama kalinya. dan tidak pingsan.

I do appreciate what he did. it was a huge thing he did for me. he really did support me. and I am so grateful. my hero.
aku sangat menghargai yang dilakukannya. hal besar. dia mendukungku, menguatkan. dan aku sangat berterima kasih, pahlawanku.


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Ibit 'slapped' me, again

I read some where about moms who have new born baby. they were to busy taking care of the newborn and ignore their older children. I'm glad you don't do so
aku pernah baca tentang ibu-ibu yang punya bayi. dia sibuk mengurus bayinya yang baru lahir dan mengabaikan kakak si bayi. aku senang ibu ngga gitu'

***

that's now.
itu sekarang.

I confess. when my twin were born, I ignored Ibit -- though I didn't mean to. I spend most of my time for the twins, and less for Ibit. I demanded Ibit to take care of her self when she was still three years old. I yelled at her for things shouldn't be yelled at.
aku ngaku dosa. dulu jaman kembar lahir, aku mengabaikan Ibit -- walau sama sekali tidak bermaksud begitu. waktuku tercurah ngurusin bayi kembar dan sedikit banget untuk Ibit. aku menuntut Ibit yang belum genap tiga tahun untuk mandiri. memarahi untuk hal-hal yang tidak seharusnya disebut kesalahan.

I remember she slammed the door because she said some thing but I didn't pay attention. may be after three years later, I realized the mistake I've done. too late I know. but as soon as that I tried to pay. I support every obsession she has, fulfill every hope. hard, as she is a perfectionist. maybe not enough but I try my best.
aku ingat dia membanting pintu karena tidak kugubris permintaannya. mungkin baru setelah kembar berumur tiga tahunan, aku menyadari bahwa aku hutang banyak perhatian untuk dicurahkan ke putriku itu. telat banget, I know. tapi aku sesegera itu berusaha membayar. mendukung setiap obsesinya, berusaha memenuhi setiap harapannya. sulit, karena dia perfeksionis. mungkin belum cukup, tapi aku berusaha.

***

I used to do so, when your twin brothers were born
dulu Ibu begitu, waktu adik kembarmu baru lahir


I don't remember
aku tidak ingat

you were so young. but I do remember (and my regrets still goes on...)
kamu masih kecil. tapi Ibu ingat (nyeselnya belum ilang, dan ga bisa dibayar, nak...)

why are you not like that now? you still take care of me and Ar Ir although you are busy with dek Ai'
kenapa sekarang ngga begitu? Ibu tetep ngurusi kakak-kakak meskipun repot ngurusin dek Ai'

because now I know I was wrong. I don't want to do the same mistake. beside, you and Ar Ir are big kids now. you all are so clever helping me taking care of dek Ai'. so I still have much time for you big brothers and sister.
karena sekarang Ibu tahu dulu Ibu salah. ngga mau begitu lagi. lagian, kakak-kakak sudah besar, pinter bantuin Ibu ngurusin dek Ai' jadi Ibu tetep ada waktu ngurusin kakak-kakak...

***

I still don't know how to thank Ibit...
ga tahu deh bagaimana harus berterima kasih ke Ibit...


she always find a way to cheer up herself. like this picture, what do you think she was doing?
dia selalu punya cara untuk menghibur diri sendiri. seperti foto ini, menurutmu dia sedang apa?

the facts - a note seven days after.

Fakta-fakta - sebuah catatan setelah tujuh hari.

I'm not in the mood of being sentimental. I just want to talk facts.
aku sedang tidak mood being sentimental. aku mau bicara fakta saja.

@Fact 1: Dek Ai' was delivered after exactly 40weeks pregnancy and over 14 hours struggling.
Fact 2: Was so tiny, 5,5 lbs and 19 inches.
Fact 3: Succeeded early initiation within 30 minutes.

Fakta 1: Dek Ai lahir setelah kehamilan selama 40 minggu, dan 14 jam perjuangan di ruang bersalin.
Fakta 2: Kecil, cuma 2,4 kg dan 48 cm.
Fakta 3: Berhasil dalam Inisiasi Menyusui Dini di 30 menit setelah kelahirannya.



Fact 4: He was, and still yellow due to Icterus, high bilirubin in his blood. Therefore he needs extra sunbathing every morning, and much maternity milk flowing -- to gain weight and rinse the bilirubin along with the pee.
Fakta 4: Tubuhya kuning karena Icterus, kandungan bilirubin yang tinggi dalam darah. Karenanya dia butuh dijemur tiap pagi, dan banyak minum ASI -- untuk menambah berat badan dan menggelontor bilirubinnya keluar bersama urine.


Fact 5: As the doctor told me, a yellow baby sleeps a lot, over 18 hours a day. I need to wake him up every other hour to breastfeeding.
Fakta 5: Seperti kata dokter, bayi kuning banyak tidur, lebih dari 18 jam sehari. Aku harus membangunkannya tiap 2 jam untuk menyusui.


Fact 6: He is now 7 days old, and like I've always wished and my every prayer, I wish for his health.
Fact 7: I'm just a mother, who has found him as my new reason to live. And I'll do the best I can, that's all I can do.

Fakta 6: Sekarang Dek Ai' sudah 7 hari, dan seperti yang selalu aku mohon dalam doa, aku memohon untuk kesehatannya.
Fakta 7: Aku cuma seorang ibu, yang mendapatinya sebagai alasan baru bagiku untuk hidup. Aku akan memberikan yang terbaik yang aku bisa, hanya itu yang aku bisa.




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