Tuesday, February 28, 2012
The Super Sensitive
May be he is. But dek Ai' must be super sensitive then.
Whenever he sees a little 'hard' thing around, such as some one falling, or a fight, or a scream; he cries.
He likes to hear me singing. But when I get to hi-tones, he cries.
This evening I helped my twins doing their math homework. I did my best to explain the method. I repeat it again and again, but still they didn't understand. It was simple. But it was me who couldn't explain it well.
Then I started speaking loud. Dek Ai' was sleepy and hugging me. I should have taken him to bed. But I still hadn't finished helping the twins doing their homework. I lost my patience. Then I start yelling. I didn't notice that my loud voice has made Ai' cry. The louder I yelled, the louder he cried. Suddenly I realized Dek Ai' was like, crying hysterically.
I, right then stop yelling. I lower my tone, brought Ai' away from the twins and tried to calm him down. I know it was my voice that made him cry. But I needed to be away from the twin to stop yelling.
I still said half whispering to the twins, 'I give up. I don't know how to make you understand. I'm not a good teacher. Ask your teacher tomorrow how to do it.'
It took few minutes for me to calm down Dek Ai' until he finally fell asleep. Right now I'm feeling like I have been a terrible monster and frightened my own baby.
God, I need to gain more patience.